Back in Kampala! Thinkings about the life in the village!

On the 21st April 2010 I travelled back to Kampala.
A lecturer from Makarere, the one who supported me to find a student assisting my research, proposed to pick me up from Muhanga brining me to Mbarara because he spent some time in Kanungo, one district near Kabale. His family stays there.

I did not enjoy the last hours and even the last days in Muhanga. I was sad to leave this place! I walked a last time through the village, saying good bye to those ones I have not met the last days... it was really sad!

I had to wait for my taxi about four hours longer than appointed, but during this time I had interesting conversations with policemen. We have been sitting near their “office” (a very small wooden hut with one bench, a table and a chair) and the main tap. We have been talking about Uganda and Austria, the differences in lifestyle, language, culture...
Very different is the way they see the liaison between women and men. Marriage and children are playing a very important role in their life. Most of them want to have at least four children. Often they mentioned the argument that having more children is a kind of a security when you are getting old. “Imagine if one of your children dies und you only have one or two?”
Some of them asked me to stay with them in Uganda and also to marry them.
I asked myself if it is “normal” or usual to ask a woman so quickly for marriage... why are they doing this?... is it because of I am “different”, because of my origins, my culture and also my skin colour??? Or do I make a too big issue out of these (thought) differences???
I could just say that I would not manage to stay together with an Ugandan man. From my point of view the role of a woman or better me in the marriage is contradicting with the perspective of these policemen. In a relationship I want to be independent and I need my freedoms. The role of man and woman should be equal, everyone has the same rights and responsibilities and there is no “typical” head of the family who is the decision-maker, or the one who is not caring for children and does not do anything in the household...
The reactions of the policeman have been surprised... they have been especially wondering that my boyfriend is cooking for me and that we do housework together. For many of them this is unimaginable.
When I am thinking about the relationship of my grandparents the attitudes are quiet confirm. In the western world many changes and transformations have been taken place in the last decades... will there be similar transitions in Africa or will they go a completely different way?
If you go to town the attitudes are different compared with those at the countryside. They are more similar to the western world. Women are able to act more independently and men are a bit more “emancipated”.
Finally I got picked and moving towards Mbarara where I stayed another day to do some interviews with staff from the Water and Sanitation Development Facility. I had a good journey with nice people. On the way we bought a lot of vegetables like pumpkins and tomatoes, matoke, onions, pineapples and pawpaw. Those things are much cheaper in the village than in town.
After doing my interviews, next day in the morning I travelled by one of the big very fast buses to Kampala. Actually I wanted to avoid to travel with such a bus because they are really fast, don’t avoid potholes and pass them with an enormous speed, overtaking everywhere... however, the travel was quiet comfortable... better than in a taxi (minibus) which is stopping many many times picking up as many people as possible and drop them.
I reached Kampala safe, but then I had the challenge to find out where I have to drop the bus, where I am and how I get to the office. I have been deboarding there where most of the people got out. Many people have been croweded around the bus to pick you with their boda bodas, special hires and taxis. It was quiet confusing. I found one guy who picked my rucksack and brought me to a boda boda to bring me to the office. Highly packed with my big rucksack on the handle bar of the motor-bike and one small on my back, the guy brought me safe to the office.

Back in Kampala! The life feels different. It’s very busy, lots of traffic, bad air, many people, croweds of people...
I have spent the next days in Kampala, alone in the house of my colleague who spent some time in Austria. It felt lonely and something was missing in this a big house, alone, with a night guard and a day guard...
I missed the simple life in the village!